Controlling your Feelings


What can happen if our feelings get out of control? Sometimes our feelings are very strong and they feel like they are taking over. For example, some people get so mad that they scream and yell or throw things – these are examples of being out of control with our feelings.

Usually, we have to calm our body first, and then talk with someone about our feelings when we are calm.

Here are some safe and healthy ways to deal with strong feelings:

  • Walk away
  • Go somewhere to be alone
  • Take deep breaths
  • Call someone you trust
  • Squeeze a stress ball
  • Draw or color for relaxation
  • Sometimes smells can make you calm down and relax. If you have a favorite scent, put it on a piece of clothing or paper to smell and take a deep breath in as you inhale.
  • Touch and textures can also be comforting. If you have a favorite piece of clothing, like a shirt or sweater, put it on. Dry brushing can be relaxing for some.
  • Singing a song or humming can also be a way to calm down when you’re feeling nervous or overwhelmed.

It is important to talk about how we feel while also showing respect for the other person by staying calm.

You should find the best way to calm your body if you tend to lose control. This is something you may need to practice until it becomes more natural for you.

Try to find a way to calm your body and mind if you feel out of control. Talk to someone. Ask for help.

NOTE: If you have a gut feeling that you are in danger, you do not need to show respect – you need to leave and call for help.